Look upon Jesus, Count Joyfully!

something happier tone bah.. sounds so saddening to blog all the bad thots...

today i went friendst*r.. haha.. long time since i went in lahz... aiyo.. see all my testimonies make me feel so loved.. i missed the old old times..!!

wells.. i love you peeps.. kinda missed every bit of my life spent with you all....

I guess.. everytime when i find things hard moving.. you all nv fails to push me on..

God is so so so sweet to me!

wells.. on another hand.. i've got sth to update you.
today i have a devotion!
wuwu shared about John 14: 1-4 : "1"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God[a]; trust also in me. 2In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. 3And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. 4You know the way to the place where I am going."

you know what!!! it was like jumping out at me when i read it la... oh my! i really really feel so encourage.. God actually says he has prepared a place for me... so my duty is not worry. cos... he will take me there. and i just have to trust in him for all things have been done for me!

wells.. guess i sound like a sua gu... ahha.. but anyway.. i really appreciate it alots! i'm so comforted... no matter whether its worship.. outreach or whichever.. God's place is the best place.. i just have to ask him to take me there.

God.. please take me there! i just wanna be where you are.. dwelling daily in your presence.. I just dun wan to think anymore.. can i be just at the right place!? Bring me there...

wells.. tho a tiny bit of me.. says tat... where got so easy? its not easy to find God's place in this disgusting world. but wells.. i'm not finding le. GOd will take me there.

Jesus also says... "27Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

see.. what a great relief...

23Jesus replied, "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him."
You know what i've been wrong...i thot God is telling me to build a house for him... but wrong. He has already built the house... and i'm staying in his House.
It is how i'm going to maintain this house? with what???

OF Course.. with Love. with Time, with His Word!

Lovely!

Zephaniah 3:20 says, " At that time I will gather you; at that time I will bring you home. I will give you honor and praise among all the peoples of the earth when I restore your fortunes [d]before your very eyes," says the LORD."

I just have to wait for his Time.

GOd.. I just wanna wait for your time but.. i know i am impatient.. i have a time limit in my head... but GOd doesn't...

Please help me O Lord... be prepared and be prayful towards You.

May I find your answers to my questions.

off to sleep... zzzZZZZzzzzz

Joyce

Thank you Father, Amen!

hello.. i cried again.. ha..
actuallie din wanna type this out here de. really thot that shld just write in my own prayer diary. but i just felt like i just have to say it now. cos if i suppressed further i'm going to be worse.

(for those people that think that blog is for people who simply adores themselves.. then too bad la. i'm not tt.. i'm just enjoying this amount of space on the net that i can be recording my life that i may reflect on other occasions)

argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
this really don't feel good.

sometimes i just dun understand myself.. got big things cry.. small things also cry. nothing also cry. hai..

i just know that God really have his reasons...

i just can't stand it. I don't really want to think anymore. Not where to serve.. how to serve... blah blah... i know there is a big patch of mist in my life right now which i dun wish to clear!

i just wanna study.. dun wanna think.

i just wanna do my work... as a student..

my classmate look at me and say.. "ee.. be a christian is not good de. i dun wan to be one."
guess my life is not a good reflector...

the last time i heard that my life did some good was in sec 4 where by my best friend at that time told me.. that you are really changed for the better..

wells.. i'm just a small gurl. a tiny one. a mini one... cannot see at all if you put me in the crowd of hundreds and thousands. God is a big big God. He stand out at all times. (its whether he wants to)

Sometimes i just wanna say.. i can never reach God's standard... why bother!!!!!

I cried at the commissioning night... i was so moved by the changing lives. Even they were just encouraging people to be in his Harvest. Having Authority, Calling and Place.................. (haha.. where's mine?)

The song went on.. about how we just wan to see God's face at the end of the race to hear him say. " My child, well done, you have ran and completed the race well..." Tears just streamed down like river la.. overflowing.. its so much of my heart cry la...

today i cried.. just thinking of thots that flooded into my mind.. about worship.. outreach.. crusade... how i remember wendy say that," you're just a student.. how are you going to cope with so many things.. which even a fulltime staff finds it hard to balance between church and crusade?"

over the past few months.. i felt really sandwiched between crusade and church. Sometimes.. i thot of just running away... which i think that what both sides wouldn't want me to do. and of course i could tell is not right like duh!

i wanted to pick up worship.. is also learning to listen for God. I think sometimes is not the capability that matters.. it is how much i'm ready and willing to just take steps of faith which i can't see ahead of me. kevin sounded really encouraging.. so is leslie... but.. i'm so lost..

i dun want to hear voices saying that.. you sure cannot do it de la... how you know you are gifted in this area... this is not going to be easy.... imagining the looks of the people's disapproving faces.... arghhh.. its just killing me slowly la....

outreach... i'm beginning to doubt whether i really have the passion for it la...seeing lay kwan say how much we need revival.. why God dun send her instead... i just have to be honest and say.. why me?

so much for saying that God said clearly at the beginning of the year for me to concentrate on E. Look at myself.. what am i concentrating on... haiz. so messy....

i was really glad when da vinci seminar was so successful. i'm glad that is over.. but until now i haven't type the forms la... soon.. i'll be rushed..

i still can remember myself enjoying every single tasks given to me!.. I enjoyed many things! even just stapling things.. or like typing things..

what now.. what happened joyce? what got into you?

i duno know...............

hello.. so long nv update bloggie le.. was pretty upset with many things lahz.. than didn't really have time to blog.. and plus too many things too luan for me le....

i lazy to type out my everyday life today.. so.. i'll just summarize all the happenings bah.. hee..

Firstly.. one of the important things tt happened is that i've decided to sign a new contract with God le. Wells.. if you have not know that i'm regained my single status.. take it as i'm telling you now. haha.. now i dun wan to think about anything that links to relationship with anyone. I just wanna spend time with God. Reflect on His Word and grow in Him. My new contract is not beri long la.. but enough for me to grow can le. if you wanna know more.. then let me know bah.

Daniel, i'm sorry wor. For so many things tt happened in the past and even now.. If you still regard me as your friend.. you will be able to see my blog bah! Go and start anew bah. Be the Daniel that God want you to be. I am also learning and growing. I know you will be happier in the Lord!

Next.. i'm so busy with church and crusade now..
Da Vinci Code is coming up... i'm so excited... i pray that everyone will come to know the Truth! You know.. all the lies in there are just great material for sharing Christ. I pray that God will touch lives!
Please pray for me.. Pray for Da Vinci Code Seminar...
This is Samantha's beautiful work...

Come for the Seminar ok! Thanks alot.

Lastly... pray for my new pcgm.. i want to be a good pcgl.. I want to be there for my gurls. I want to grow them. I want to give them my best.

i've haven't been much of myself recently.. is not really only the breakup is affecting me.. but very much that i couldn't understand why my gurls one by one dun trust me. Is just so hurting to know all these while I haven't really know them.

I want to be a good leader. maybe i'm just not gifted in this area.

is just so painful to know that they dun ever tell me about their life. tho i tried my best to be sharing my life with them. my busyness has cost them to be away from me.. tho my heart always longs to be a pillar of support to them.. i just know how badly i have performed.

God i'm so sorry. i duno what else i can do. even i cry also dun help anything now.

God i'm so sorry. painful. so painful. more painful than my separation from daniel.

i just want to rest in your arms, Daddy!